A Quieter Mind

This blog has been so neglected that I am not even sure if anyone will read this post.

Six months have elapsed since I wrote about the challenges for 2010. It is painfully obvious that blogging is taking a back seat to social networking. However, that is not the complete story.

Time and again, I have mentioned that for me, writing is a vehicle to greater clarity of mind. Which is why I have used this blog as a vehicle to raise issues that made me unquiet. In the past couple of years, this unquietness has faded away and a serenity has taken its place.

I have spent the past several months thinking about whether this serenity is a cynical, nihilistic futility of an existentialist flavor or a true acceptance of the world around me. I am not entirely sure, and perhaps I may never know.

What I do know is that instead of becoming unquiet over how religion is misused for nefarious purposes, or how the spirit of scientific inquiry is lost in today’s education, or how politicians and gangsters are tearing the very fabric of society, I have come to accept that no one can change any of this by blogging about it. There is a quiet acceptance of this within me now, and a realization that there is only one thing I can do, and that is how I conduct myself as a person and raise my daughter as a father.

It is this drive, this force within me to continue to change and fully immerse myself in raising a child that makes me think that my quietness is not nihilistic, but simply realistic.

I wonder if I will blog more if I forget the title of my blog. There are times when I have felt like writing – about positive things, enjoyable experiences, fulfilling adventures – but did not because there was nothing ‘unquiet’ about them. Does this mean I will need to change the title of my blog that I have lovingly built over the years? Now, that thought certainly makes me unquiet.

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  • i have 🙂
    actually, the change has to come from within – in our transactions with the world around us. be it bringing up kids, or spending time with youngsters.
    I got the greatest compliment last year, when one of my student’s said that i changed their way of looking at the world 🙂

  • Calamur,

    “Change has to come from within” – very well said! Very true.

    That is a great compliment. What else can a teacher aim for? 🙂

  • why, i feel you are writing less because you want to conform to the blog title you have chosen. 🙂 conformity can be as demanding and counter-productive as many other negatives..

    if you blog about ‘positive things, enjoyable experiences, fulfilling adventures’ i am sure you will be doing service to many readers who have ‘an unquiet mind.’ what say? 🙂

    on a different tangent, very touching lines there about your daughter.

  • Gauri,

    “Conformity can be as demanding and counter-productive as many other negatives…”

    Insightful comments like these are rejuvenating the blogger in me – thanks! 🙂

    Am still pondering over blogging; am trying to identify the DNA that ties my blog posts and what I write about and keeps it alive.

    I realized after posting that this was coincidentally written on Fathers’ Day! 🙂

  • Rest assured, your posts are awaited. 🙂

    That acceptance that you speak of, is the same thing that I accepted, a while ago, with lot of discomfort. Just today evening, my insistence on stopping the car before the stop line and the pedestrian crossing caused much angst to the folks honking hard, behind me, who were in a huge hurry. Perhaps it is a negligent behavioral trait, not necessarily contributing to a change in the world. However – like you say, the change has to be within and has to translate into action. Baby steps, these.

    As regards the blog title, I don’t think that should cause any hindrance – it is the state of unquiet-ness that causes thought; thought that is compelling and an invitation for enlightening conversation and dialogue.

    Cheers!

  • Atul,

    “state of unquiet-ness that causes thought; thought that is compelling and an invitation for enlightening conversation and dialogue”

    Again, very well said! – thank you!

  • I do see where you get that feeling of not wanting to write anymore. At some point, we reconcile with the fact that there won’t be any change no matter how much we scream ourselves hoarse. But you will never have an idea how many minds you’ve made a difference to. No doubt change is something that just has to come from within. But it’s a triumph even if you just get people to reflect, or make them aware of a perspective that has never crossed their mind before. And that’s enough to begin a stir; the first step to a not just potential, but a very likely change.

    I’m not sure if you were raised an atheist – I’m willing to bet you weren’t. There had to be some incident or some words – in writing or otherwise – that made you question the existence of God for the very first time. The journey after that was your own, but it probably did take someone or something external to sow those seeds, right? Little does that source know it changed you so much.

    With what/how you write be assured you have sown such seeds into many a mind. Write when you get a chance, and when you have something to say. But please don’t stop writing; your thoughts are valuable to more people than you think 🙂

    g

  • g,

    Your kind words humble me. The only way I can thank you is to keep writing, which I will.

  • I’m still reading. Your writing is beautiful, and I would love to hear anything you write about… the peaceful or turbulent. I’m so glad your life and daughter gleams you satisfaction. If at any point in my life I get to where you are, I will be glad of it. In this way I am envious of you, (yet don’t worry, not in a malicious way) 🙂

  • Fast Dots

    Mahendra – it was a pleasant surprise to see your post after so long. Rest assured that we still read it 🙂

    For someone like you (and me) the serenity does not last very long. Enjoy it ;-). And yes, you cannot change anything by blogging about it; I have always viewed blogs (and the interacting comments) as a forum for exchanging ideas, so please dont ever give that up!

    I am a bit surprised at your definition of “unquiet” though – esp. with your blogs tag line of “…reason and emotion” – please do blog about all your thoughts and experiences; I for one will be glad to share them!

  • @mystic_life and @Fast Dots:

    Thank you. Apologies for the delay in responding.

    I feel honored to have readers like you on this blog!